Say No to Bare Arms (and Necks and fingers)

Unlike many of my gender, I have never delighted much in jewelry- it seemed too much fuss on top of my daily turmoil on what to wear. However, clothing designers of current have been branching out into accessories, ranging from belts to jewelry. The recent explosion of Hollywood stylists have only added fuel to the fire by decking out their celeb clients from head to finger in fully realized "looks." So I guess it was inevitable that I too would be swept up in the craze. I stick to the wallet friendly costume stuff- no pricey jewels and certainly no diamonds (there is no real guarantee in "conflict free"). Accessories are also a fabulous way to experiment on color for those timid ladies stuck in a black and beige rut. Here are some of my favorite trends in body ornamentation.

Agh!-Choo

As my pile of yet-to-be read fashion periodicals reached eye level, I decided to whittle the stack down to size. Flipping through the November issue of Instyle, I saw an article that left me speechless (well, almost). Jimmy Choo, in collaboration with the Swedish retailers H&M, is launching a limited edition of shoes and bags with more proleterian price tags of under $200. Nooooo... I screamed! How could Ms. Mellon betray us devout Choo-ists in such a manner? Part of my worship of the Jimmy Choo brand lies in their exclusivity. Don't get me wrong, I don't begrudge anyone a good bargain, but part of the joy of walking the streets with that pale lavender Jimmy Choo shopping bag is knowing I possess something coveted by many women yet owned by few. I take pride in the fact that my Choos are meticulously crafted by Italian cobblers (the undisputed masters of leather and shoes), and not mass produced in some Chinese sweatshop. If I could purchase and discard them like rubber flip-flops, Jimmies would somehow lose their luster. It brings me a certain sense of pride to curate over my small gallery of stiletto masterpieces. And let's be honest, would Michelangelo's David or Van Gogh's Starry Night be considered treasured art if one could pick up a copy at the local Walmart? So, Ms. Mellon, please heed my appeal, and resist the profitable but pedestrian appeal of mass merchandising. Jimmy Choo on the cheap simply de-values the brand and its afficionados. It's the age old distinction between couture and pret-a-porter. And if these arguments haven't worked, consider Signor Blahnik still sketches every design, carves the last (that's shoe model for novices), chooses the materials, and supervises the factory craftsman. That is what I call devotion to one's art-and that's priceless.

Don't "Fall" For These Trends

While my wish list for the Fall season is predictably long, the focus for this report are the trends to which sensible stylists should "just say no."

Trend #1: Harem/Full pants. In the words of M.C. Hammer, "can't touch this."

Trend #2: Patent leggings. The shiny black skin look did make Flipper a household name, but unfortunately, there are no scuba diving facilities at my office so there will nary be an opportunity to strut in these.

Trend #3: The OTK boots (that's Over The Knee for those illiterate in the fashion lingo).

Brother, Can You Spare a Sol?

After 10 years of stateside sequestration, your friendly neighborhood LSL finally managed to keep enough money out of the shoe fund to take a well earned vacation. In the spirit of "paying it forward," and not make the trip all 'bout me, I decided to join a charitable (but secular) mission. Three plane rides, one rocky cliffside bus trip and a flat tire later, my mission team arrived in a remote village in the Andean mountains of Peru. After four days and five nights of elevated camping, we were ready to luxuriate in finer digs. We spent our last day in a converted monastery cum five star hotel and appreciating the culture of Cusco, Peru. Then I saw it- the most gorgeous knitted cardigan coat made of baby alpaca and silk, the likes of which I had never seen- in the hotel lobby. Well, I determined to find its twin in the less expensive and more bargain friendly street shops. Alas, an entire day of hunting only turned up far from close matches. I resigned myself to paying full retail (ugh!) and trekked back to the hotel. Love...the knit was as soft as a baby's you know what. Actually, the price tag did not send me into shock- oops, that was for the belt, not the cardigan. How many soles (2.90 to the US dollar) did the sales lady say?!!! I hung my head down and said no, could not justify it. As I put my money away, I made one last counter offer, using cash as my bargaining levy. She agreed and I hurriedly stole off with my find and 3 US dollars to my name. Silly, I did not bring much cash as this was supposed to be a working vacation, not an overseas shopping trip. I suddenly realized- how was I to pay for the cab and airport fees to go home? I borrowed $20 from our group leader, but found out in Lima that the fee was $31, no credit cards accepted. My ATM was in my wallet- at home. For the longest 15 minutes, I thought I was to going to have to make a home of Peru for the sake of a cardigan and cursed my vanity once more. An airport worker saw my distress and pointed to a bank. After paying $16 in fees for an $11 cash advance, I paid my way to the gate just in time to board, snug in my baby alpaca ransom. So, if anyone ever doubted my love and devotion to all things fashionably wearable, I present this cautionary tale as irrefutable evidence.

Get In-Vested

The last half a year I have been engaged in an obsessive search for an item seen all over the runways and glossy prints- the vest. We have seen them in every fabric and style- from sexy body hugging to casually loose, rocker tough to pinstripe conservative, urban to posh, basic cotton to fur-lined suede. And, if you look in the right places, the right one for you does not have to be a major financial investment, lol.

Here is my version- surprise, it was from that megaplex Swedish import of affordable trends, H&M. At last visit, H&M had more than a rackfull of cuts and colors- at budget friendly price points of around $24.95. Proof positive that I can mix it up chic and cheap with the best of the fashion rags.

Fall Wish List

As I boil and baste in this week's humid heat wave, I dream of cooler weather. Here are just a few of my autumn fancies, gleaned from sources 'round the world.







And of course, the shoes.....

Early Birds Just Lose Sleep

If the early bird gets the worm, I am forever doomed to starvation. Can I help it if my internal clock seems to have a sticky snooze button? But when it starts affecting my wardrobe's growth potential, disaster ensues. At the beginning of the spring '09 season, the maestros at Jimmy Choo did a first- they collaborated with the Hunter company, the masters of bad weather shoes, to make a signature wellington. Of course, being Jimmies, they are no ordinary rain boots, but a croc-embossed, side buckle-detail, high gloss masterpiece. As soon as I saw them in the Bergdorf Goodman catalogue, I knew they would be snapped up sooner than you can say "over-priced designer shoes." Being the incurable latecomer that I am, I dragged my feet in the acquisition process. By June, the entire country had sold out and the waiting list was backed up to March. Only a devout Chooist could understand my devastation. To add insult to injury, I realized I had also missed out on the last markdown for spring fashions at Barney's after reading and re-publishing my first anniversary blog. It was as if my ghost of Christmas past was visiting me to run an intervention. I lost no time and hopped on the first F train to Bergdorf's- I decided to skip Barney's as their couture castoffs were likely well on their way to the warehouse for the big semi-annual sale. To my chagrin, the size 5.5 clearance racks were almost barren. To avert further tragedy, I decided to adopt at least one pair of Jimmy Choo sandals. Sure they were a little Miami flashy, but as Abby my Choo broker knows, my taste in shoes is as understated as Vegas at night. As the shoe purveyor was about to wrap up my sale, I took a chance and asked if BG would be getting a second wave of the wellies. Lightning struck and to my disbelief, she told me they would not get any more shipments, but a customer had returned a pair - in size 5!
So to all those friends, family members and colleagues who have tried to reform my procrastinating ways, I counter with another old adage- good things come to those who wait. P.S. If you had to ask, naturally, I bought the wellies.

Paper Anniversary

In honor of the LSL blog first anniversary, I am re-publishing the first post. An anniversary tale will soon be forthcoming....

Below is the photo of my last big find, or as my fearless shopping companion V calls them, the "Red Carpet" shoes. What's more, they were 50% off the original price. Okay, so that's 50% off of $1000, but this is wearable art. Can you really price a Gaugin or Van Gogh? By the way, this little treasure was excavated from the racks of Barney's the second week of July, which is when they typically make their final markdown for spring lines (shopping tip #1!). Barney's tip #2- you'll find a better selection and items are in better condition at the main store on the last week of the season sales, than at the warehouse sale, with the exception of men's clothing. However, my most pilgrimaged house of worship is on 57th and Fifth Ave- that's Bergdorf Goodman if you have to ask (and if you did have to ask, you're meditating on the wrong blog). I can't bring myself to reveal the best time to save your dime at BG's yet, for fear of competition from the other 3 million female competitors in NYC. Women at shoe sales are a true Darwinian experience- only the fittest survive. Back to my story- I call V my shopping companion and not partner, as she has the most admirable sense of retail self control. Picture us at the Jimmy Choo boutique: Abigail, the most infectious shoe-natic sales rep, fast at work charging up my plastic passport to consumerism, turns to V and asks if she can show her something. V stoically sits with her hands in her lap and replies simply, "No, I have to go [home] this year"- apparently, 600 hundred dollar shoes are not in that budget. V buys her shoes for 15 dollars and has not once bought a garment nor shoe on any of our outings. I, on the other hand, will eat Cup O'Noodles for 2 months for the perfect pair of Jimmy Choo strappy sandals. Actually, before I was more financially endowed, I really did live off dried fried noodles, peanut M&Ms and Doritos for fashion. What's the old saying about sacrificing for one's art? I believe every female pride (that's a National Geographic reference) has someone like V to balance the irrational spenders such as myself. She's the yin to my yang in the shopping universe.

All's Fair in Love, War, and Sample Sales

LSL is coming out of a hibernation- what can I say, it seemed an extra long winter this year in the city. What news can I relay? Just a short fable which ends, as fables must, with a lesson to be learned. Several months ago, my shopping buddy Viv and I trekked to the garment district to scope out a sample sale which promised my beloved label Missoni and a bonus offering of gowns by Valentino and Marchesa. I scored on a couple of Missoni knit dresses, then decided to try my luck with some evening wear. I could not resist playing dress up in the gorgeous full-length Marchesa gowns, but placed them back on the racks in the name of practicality. After all, there is no Oscar red carpet moment in my forseeable future (Hollywood has yet to option LSL's ruminations on fashion for a celluloid incarnation for some incomprehensible reason). I did, however, find a Valentino black dress with a sheer sequined bodice that would be the perfect sparkly cocktail LBD, with a few nips and tucks. By this time, the end of the business day crept up on us and the sales ladies rushed us to finish. Viv and I decided on 2 Missoni's and the Valentino and scurried to the register. I silently cursed myself that I did not make a pre-sample sale trip to the ATM and had to pay the piper with plastic. As the register lady rang up my spoils and read the total, a little voice told me something was off- Viv's face also registered the same sense of perplexion. We left the building, then looked at the receipt- YES, it seemed they had forgotten to ring up the Valentino dress. We walked away gleefully, our thrill only slightly tinged with guilt for getting away with something for which we did not pay (you've all been there). Maybe I deserved a reward for the previous 2 decades of honorable behavior. That adrenaline rush was short-lived, for the following day, I noted an additional charge on my credit card. As I ruefully told Viv, she pointed out perhaps it was karma for our ethical slip-up. Yes, I conceded, one could walk away from this experience with the moral that honesty is the best honesty, but readers, my personal advice from this cautionary tale is this: when it comes to the checkout counter, paper is better than plastic (read: take cash)!

Hope Springs Eternal

With daily media reportings of an impending financial Armageddon, worldwide disasters, territorial warfare, Central American drug cartels, melting polar ice caps, etc... it's difficult to justify my zen for such trivial pursuits as fashion. But when the world seems to have descended into madness and chaos, don't we all look for comfort in some form of escapism? Such was the reason for the boom of overly extravagant film productions during the bust times of the Great Depression. So with no further guilt, I am perusing the Spring runway collections of some favored designers. Here follows a peek of my picks thus far. Stay tuned for more unabashed adulations of all things superficial.

Oscars 2009

The world's most anticipated and watched fashion runway show has come and gone, and of course, every fashionista has her 2 cents. Here are mine.

Although no one quite took my breath away, and the color palette was unimaginative, here are a handful of my favorite looks.

On the flip side, she had it right at the SAG awards, where she ruled the red carpet with a sapphire blue Monique Lhuillier gown which was a perfect fit and color for this melanin-challenged actress.

I usually try to celebrate the beauty in life and not spread negativity, but what fashion editorial is complete without a "Don't" list?

Somewhere Over the Rainbow

After a very successful winter sample sale season, your own LSL (aka Pres. Obama's stimulus plan) has imposed upon herself another spending moratorium. Just as well, because there is officially no more room in my claustrophobic pied a terre. Which is why I dream of space- not the final frontier of Trekkies, but the earthbound kind of which all NY'ers fantasize. My sister once stated, quite correctly, that I did not need a house, just a bedroom and a REALLY BIG CLOSET. Eight years into my love/hate relationship with New York, I'm still waiting for my Shangri La, a walk-in closet of the Vogue kind. Until then, I settled for my two (not at all) walk-in closets. Next came the flea market cabinets cum makeshift "shoe closets". Then the elevator shoes for the bed to squeeze under giant plastic storage boxes. Let's not forget the space under the futon, on top of the TV cabinet, under the bedroom wardrobe, and on the oven racks. Note: the latter spot had to be abandoned after an unfortunate albeit small oven fire (yes, mom, I'm alright). The final sacrifice was the extra half bath, now a walk-in closet of sorts thanks to a portable clothes rack from Bed, Bath & Beyond. Does this spell the end of my adventures in fashion and this blog of run-on sentences commenmorating the same? Of course not- a couple months of spring cleaning and a dropoff to Housing Works, and LSL will be back in commission.

Scroll to bottom of page to learn more "About me."

Bride of the Michelin Man

NYC's arctic freeze this winter has proved that my vanity does in fact have its limit (gasp!). Up until this year, I insisted on looking "cute" in my fur-lined wool coat, never mind the frostbite. Finally, single digit pre-windchill temperatures forced me to admit the impracticality of my stubborn superficiality. I hightailed it to a Brooklyn Industries boutique and begrudgingly walked out with a full length puffer jacket, certain I would be mistaken for the Michelin Man. All doubts were swept away with a swift of the biting winds- sealed into the jacket, I felt as if I was cocooned by a warm down comforter. Besides, this particular item was a steal, marked down from $200 to $69 (and tax free). The chevron stitching and an inner adjustable elastic waistband allowed me to reclaim some part of my petite form. So what if I looked like a toasted marshmallow in that golden brown concoction. You know what they say- when life hands you marshmallows, make s'mores.

Holiday Excess

In January, when the rest of the country is busy making resolutions to lose excess poundage, my yearly resolve is to fatten up- my wardrobe. In light of the economically challenging times, I anticipated deeper discounts and more bang for my proverbial buck. I patiently stalked the iconic Bergdorf Goodman second floor shoe racks, waiting for that final markdown which surely would be record breaking this year. Finally, after the post-holiday crowds thinned out, my credit card charging conspirator "V" and I went out treasure hunting. To our surprise, the chest had already been looted almost empty, from Barney's to Saks Fifth Avenue. I was thoroughly upset- didn't my consuming competitors realize the simple economic concept of supply and demand? When consumers hold out, retailers lure them out with offers that cannot be refused in order to clear unsold stock. In a desperate attempt to save the New Year festivities, we headed towards the birthplace of my addiction- the flagship Jimmy Choo boutique tucked off Fifth Avenue. I was thrilled to find an unprecedented half off sale. While I was plied with size 5.5 stilettos, V gave commentary. In the end, with help from Abigail, my favorite Jimmy Choo-ist, and the rest of the crew (who, by the way, are never snobby as are most New York retailers), I'm still managing to emerge from my winter hibernation a little heavier- by two shopping bags to be exact.



This year, I'm daring to wear animal prints with this sandal that has an understated sexiness. These black suede booties gain distinction with ruching.